On the night of the Big Game, Shane and David have met again by pure chance.  They reconnect later over the phone, and remember what life was like at the Roosevelt Academy for Troubled Boys.  As the night’s rainstorm begins to fall, they have to deal with the ghosts of their past, while Todd is forced to deal with his ghosts in the present.

And now the annoying warning message:

This story deals with sex between males, in graphic detail. If you're not over 18, it is illegal for you to even look at this so stop right now.  If homosexual content is not your cup of tea, you can leave the tea party.  The characters and story are copyright Teiran’s player 2005, do not redistribute without permission.  Otherwise, enjoy!

-Teiran

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High School Days Ch 17

Lost Without You

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David opened his eyes as the phone rang for the second time.  The kangaroo blinked unsteadily as lightning lit the room and blinded him for a moment, and then everything was dark again.  The sound of heavy rain filled David’s large ears as his eyes adjusted to the soft glow in his tiny room.  The phone rang again and David lifted the handset from his chest and stared at it.  Blearily, he hit the ‘On’ button and held the phone up to his long ear.  “Hello?” the kangaroo muttered sleepily as lightning flashed outside again.

Shane’s distinctive voice filled the darkness and mixed with the sound of falling rain. “Hey David.”  David felt his heart flutter at the sound of Shane’s voice over the phone. 

“Hey Shane,” David whispered with a slight smile, and the rain was the only the sound for a few moments as the kangaroo stared up at the ceiling, unsure of what to say. 

Miles away the raccoon was staring up at his own ceiling in his own tiny bed and wondering what he should say to the kangaroo.  “You make it home okay?”  Shane asked quietly.

“Yeah…” David muttered, “The old lady taking care of me is nothing compared to Sergeant Rock.”

Shane felt his throat close up, and a chill ran down his spine as he remembered the horrible rhino that still haunted his dreams.  “Yeah, I don’t think she could be worse then that bastard was.”  The raccoon whispered softly.  Shane’s masked face split into a slight grin and he shifted on his bed, sprawling across it as he listened to David’s voice. “You remember that time you were late for inspection, and he forced you to go to breakfast in nothing but your dress shirt?” 

David laughed a little, his face warming in remembered embarrassment from all the stares and laughter he had endured that morning.  It had been horrible, having to hold his shirt down over his crotch and sit with his bare ass hanging out for everyone to see as the whole school ate together.  Afterwards, several of the tougher boys had beat him up for being a ‘queer’ just to prove they hadn’t been looking at him.  “Yeah I remember.” David said sheepishly, “I got beat pretty bad by the ‘straight guys’ after that, but it sure backfired too.  I think I got more offers to mess around that week then I did all year.”  The sound of Shane’s laughter made David smile, and he stretched out on his bed into a more relaxed position.  “I think the damn pervert pulled stuff like that because he enjoyed watching.”  David muttered. 

Shane snorted, and David was surprised how angry the raccoon sounded. “I know he did.  He was always walking around without a shirt on, flexing his arms and showing off while yelling at us.  I know he was just trying to get a rise out of someone.”  The raccoon’s voice dropped down low, and he muttered bitterly, “I bet he’s fucked just as many cadets as we did.” 

David snickered, “I don’t know Shane, we fucked a lot of other cadets.  If Rock had been getting that kind of action he wouldn’t have been such a dick.”

They chuckled together for a moment and then the sound of the rain outside filled the night for a while.   They were both silent for a moment, as they remembered all of the things that the rhino had done to them during their time at Roosevelt.  David felt the warm feeling of speaking to Shane again melt away, as the cold night air crept into his fur and for a moment he was keenly aware of the tiny room around him and the heavy rain outside.  It felt terribly lonely, laying there by himself.

Eventually David whispered,  “He probably is fucking the cadets.  He tried to get me to suck him off once.”  David felt dirty just admitting it had happened, even though it was Shane he was talking too and the raccoon understood what had happened all to well.  “Almost raped me when I said no.  Gave me two black eyes instead.”  Just saying the words felt like he made David feel like he had been punched in the gut.  It was just such a horrible secret, and admitting it made it feel more real. 

Shane stared at his ceiling, watching as the fan in his room spun slowly.  His room felt cold now, and he wrapped the blanket on his bed around his shoulders.  His mouth was dry and the raccoon tried not to think about what had happened to him at the Academy, but he couldn’t forget the things the rhino had done to him.  Shane’s back itched terribly as he said,  “Please don’t remind me David.  That bastard of a rhino did horrible things to me, stuff I never got to tell you about.”

David sighed, the kangaroo’s finger’s twisting the phone cord around his paws,” I know.  He seemed to pick on you more then the rest of us.  I can’t believe how much he fucked us up.  I don’t want to think about what he did to the guys who gave him what he wanted.” 

“Yeah, he sure did fuck us up.” Shane whispered, “That place was hell.” 

They both feel silent once more, the finality of Shane’s statement summing up their lives at Roosevelt so perfectly there was nothing else to say about it.  David closed his eyes and rolled onto his back again.  He could hear Shane breathing softly in his ear.

“So…” David said finally, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.  “What do you want to talk about besides our fucked up past?”

It took a while, but Shane finally answered.  “Well, how about why didn’t you call me? You said at the coffee shop you’ve been out a week now, and you didn’t even try and reach me…” the raccoon whispered.  David could tell Shane was heart broken just from the sound of his voice.  The raccoon’s voice was so expressive you could tell just what he was feeling by listening to him.

“I didn’t even know you were in town Shane…” David muttered guilty, wanting to kick his own ass for how lame the excuse sounded.  “I’ve spent the last week looking for Todd back in my old hometown, not checking the local phone book for people I knew.  I haven’t exactly been thinking about anyone else.”

“Oh.”  Shane muttered quietly.  “So you haven’t found him yet.”

“No.” David whispered, his chest falling as he exhaled in frustration.

“I guess you still love Todd then,” the raccoon said softly.  It was more of a statement then a question, but David could here the hint of hope in Shane’s voice.

David whispered, “You know I do.”

Shane sighed quietly on the phone, and his voice sounded so sorrowful it pulled at David’s heart.  “I know.  I still remember the last time I asked you that question.”

            “It was kind of hard day to forget.”  David muttered, and the boys both smiled sadly as they remembered that last day they were at Roosevelt together.

***

Six months ago, at the Roosevelt Academy for Troubled Boys…

***

David crawled through the cramped air vent head first, grunting in pain as he twisted his body to fit thru the small passage.  The movement and pressure aggravated the many bruises he had on his chest and arms.  The kangaroo crawled forward on his belly, using his paws and legs to propel himself along the smooth metal air duct. It was getting harder and harder to fit into the small crawl spaces that twisted through out the school grounds.  His body was getting too big, his shoulders too broad, and his bruised muscles ached from the exertion.

David pushed open a side vent and poked his head thru.  Inside the small attic space the vent opened into, Shane spun around in surprise.  The raccoon crouched on his hind paws and grabbed his shirt from the floor, ready to dash into one of the other crawl spaces that left the small room, but the young raccoon sighed in relief when he recognized David’s face. 

“Where have you been?  You were supposed to be here 15 minutes ago…” The raccoon hissed as he grabbed hold of David’s paw and helped pull the kangaroo out of the air duct and into the tiny attic space.  The two boys knelt in the small space between the tin roof and the ceiling supports, brushing the dust from David fur and clothes. 

“I’m sorry,” the kangaroo muttered, keeping his voice down so that it didn’t carry thru the air conditioning system to one of the instructor’s ears.  “Sergeant Rock almost caught me sneaking into crawlspace in the bathroom so I had to use the one in the classroom in C hall….” The raccoon’s lips silenced David’s words, and David closed his eyes as Shane kissed him softly.  Both boys sighed in relief and just enjoyed the kiss.

“It doesn’t matter, all that matters is you’re here now.” Shane whispered, grinning like an idiot as he hugged David around the neck. 

David laughed softly as he finished standing up.  The kangaroo felt himself begin to blush as Shane hung from around his neck; the shorter raccoon pulling him down a little as they hugged.  The raccoon’s chest fur rubbed against the front of David’s shirt, and his long ringed tail swished back and forth as David embraced him back.

“You must be pretty horny today to forgive me that quickly,” the kangaroo whispered, both boys unbuttoning and pulling off David’s shirt.  David’s fur glistened as he began to sweat in the sweltering heat of the crawl space.  The two boys smiled and rubbed their bare chests together.  It was so relaxing to be free of the watchful eyes of the instructors of Roosevelt and be able to touch each other. 

David grinned as Shane stared up into his eyes.  It looked like the raccoon wanted to say something, but just couldn’t.  The raccoon’s ears flattening against his head as he blushed instead.  “Yeah well I guess I am horny.  It’s been a while since we’ve been able to get away,” Shane whispered, “and I want to do something different with you…” Shane’s words ended with his lips pressing against David’s, his paws reaching up to caress David’s face as they kissed again. 

The boys kissed slowly, and Shane’s paws moved down David’s body, caressing David’s chest muscles gently.  The kangaroo winced and let out a painful gasp, breaking the kiss as Shane pressed his paws against a bruise on the kangaroo’s chest.  Shane frowned, as the kangaroo pulled away from him.  “Another bruise?”  The raccoon muttered unhappily as his paws continued tracing the newly formed definition in David’s chest muscles. 

David nodded softly, “Rock slugged me in the chest yesterday when he caught me looking at Richards without his shirt on.”  The kangaroo rubbed his chest over his heart gently and muttered, “Stupid wolf is to hot to be walking around without a shirt.” 

Shane frowned and guided David down onto a pile of blankets on the floor.  “Are you going to be okay?”  The raccoon asked, his fingers gently probing the kangaroo’s chest for other bruises as the raccoon leaned up and rubbed his muzzle against David’s broad muzzle. 

David nodded “Yeah, its not as bad as the pounding he gives me in karate class.  I’ll be fine.  Besides it’s not important, not here.”  David muttered, leaning in close to Shane and rubbing his muzzle against the raccoon’s neck. “Here, I don’t have to care what he wants, do I?”  David cupped the back of the raccoon’s head with his paw and kissed him.  They kissed with a fiery passion, each determined to prove to the Academy instructors who were not even there. 

The two boys groaned softly as they continued to kiss each other.  Their paws roamed each other’s bodies, each boy desperate just to touch another person who wouldn’t push them away.  The kiss was broken several times by a painful gasps from both David and Shane.  Each time, it was because the other boy had found a bruise or cut on the other’s body.  Each time, they stopped making out and tried to treat the wounds as best they can.  Eventually, each relearned where and how they could touch each other. 

David sighed a little and sat down on the blankets that covered the floor, pulling away from Shane. “Come on, lay down coon.  I’m tired after crawling thru that damn air duct.  I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to make it here to Sanctuary, I think I’m getting to big to get thru those vents.” David sprawled out across the floor in the patch of sunlight that was streaming brightly through the only, tiny window in the attic.  The kangaroo smiled when his gaze fell on the archway over the window, where some boy long ago had carved the word “Sanctuary” across the sky so everyone who found this place would know what it was.

The little attic served as a hiding place for the tail raisers at the academy, a safe place that none of the instructors knew about.  Shane had been the one to first introduce David to the Sanctuary.  Since that first afternoon, they repeatedly hid together in the small attic formed by the slope of the roof on the third floor of the activities center.  The attic was formed because the academy had converted this building into dorms, and squared off ceilings of the rooms below to make showers.  The stuffy little room was filled with dust and the heat of the summer sun baked anyone inside it, but from the look of things, it had been a hidden retreat from the horrors of Roosevelt for generations of young tail raising cadets who were desperate not to forget who they really were.

The Sanctuary had always impressed David.  Blankets and pillows covered the floor, each one smuggled up from the laundry rooms below.  There were enough scattered around that the floor felt like a big bed.  Numerous air fresheners were hung around the room to keep the smell from becoming simply overpowering and giving away the room’s position.  Drinks and food were sometimes smuggled up, along with newspapers from the outside. 

There was even a small stack of gay magazines like “Todds” and “Playgal” hidden in one corner, and many of the boys who hid in the room tried out what the naked males in the pictures were doing things.  It was contraband of the highest art in the oppressive halls of Roosevelt, and as far as David knew could only be found in the Sanctuary and the desks of certain professors. 

Notepads were stacked neatly in corners, and served as message boards for estranged lovers unable to meet.  Some of the boys had begun to keep long diaries, which they left behind for others to find, take comfort in and continue.

None of that was what kept David coming back though.  It was the names that brought the kangaroo back.  All around the room, the names of a hundred different boys names had been carved into the wooden walls.  Hearts surrounded some names; others were followed by short declarations of undying love from one boy to another.  Most of the names stood alone, simply carved into the wood as a way of silently proclaiming the litany of boys who had been to this place long before Shane and David had come to Roosevelt. 

It made David feel supported.  He might be alone, without anyone to comfort him in the halls of the Academy, but in this little hidden place people who understood him surrounded the kangaroo.  Each name was a former student determined to prove that they were not going to be changed by their teachers and hate the filled administration of the Academy.

David figured that the Sanctuary had served as an escape for nearly every gay boy at Roosevelt at some time or another.  It was a community all it’s own, hidden and taboo. 

It was safe. It was special.

David broke himself out of his thoughts, blinking away the sunlight that had caused him to doze off.  He looked up at Shane, and the raccoon was just standing there.  He was leaning against the wall with his arms across over his gray furred chest, watching David as the kangaroo dozed in the sun.  “Well coon?”  David said with a smile.  You going to join me down here or not?” 

Shane laughed as the kangaroo pulled him down onto the blankets beside him, the raccoon’s muzzle rubbing gently against David’s. “Don’t have much choice, do I?  You’re getting pretty strong there.  I don’t think I could beat you in a karate match like I used to.”

The kangaroo smiled softly as Shane kissed his nose.  When he had first arrived, the wiry and agile raccoon had beaten him soundly in a fight in the karate classes they shared. “No, you’re the black belt, not me coon.  Sort of makes sense though.”  David ran his fingers across Shane’s forehead, his fingertips tracing the black mask of the raccoon’s face.

Shane laughed and licked the kangaroo’s fingers.  “I think you could take me.  You’ve been doing a lot of weight training.  You’re much stronger then you used to be.” The raccoon muttered, his paws rubbing David’s chest again as he snuggled close to the kangaroo.  “They probably think it’ll make you a real man,” Shane chuckled and wrinkled his nose as he kissed the kangaroo’s cheek, “but it’s just making you more irresistible.” 

David chuckled and laid his head against Shane’s.  “Yeah right, look whose talking.  You get hotter every time I see you.  You’ve put on serious muscles, and yet you stay sleek and sexy.”  David grinned and kissed the raccoon’s forehead, playfully hugging him as they bantered back and forth between each other.  Shane smiled and pressed his muzzle against the kangaroo’s chest, careful not to put pressure on David’s bruises and for a while they just lay together and talked with each other.

They were going to be able to stay in the tiny attic hideaway for much longer then usual because all their evening class had been canceled and their instructors all thought someone else was responsible for looking after them.  No one would come looking for them.  They were going to be able to just be themselves in Sanctuary.  David sighed softly, curling around Shane gently and holding him tenderly.  It was always so comforting to be around Shane.  David could lie on the blankets with his arms around Shane and forget all about the world outside the tiny room they were in now.

Sometimes they would lie silently together and just sleep beside each other.  They would hold each other gently, not really doing anything but being together.  It was so relaxing to just sleep naked with someone else, unmolested by the horrible instructors who would surely beat them senseless if they found Shane or David in the arms of another boy.  Sometimes they would talk to each other, others times they would do more.  Whatever it was, David always left feeling like himself again and not the beaten, broken person he often was when he came to the Sanctuary to hide.

David was never sure what their time in Sanctuary meant to Shane, but it was always a very pleasant way to escape the reality of the Academy for the kangaroo.  It was a way to remind himself of who he really was and to refresh his reserves.  The afternoons Sanctuary reminded David of his old life, when he spent his days with Todd in the fox’s room doing whatever they wanted to together.  He had been so happy then, and it kept him sane to recapture that feeling now, even if it was with Shane instead of Todd.

David closed his eyes, mentally kicking himself as his peaceful mood vanished.   His heart ached at the thought of holding Todd again, and he squeezed the raccoon tightly, unconsciously tucking Shane’s head under his chin.  Why did he torture himself with thoughts about his lover?  It would be another two years before he was 18 and old enough to leave Roosevelt.  Two years before he could escape this hellish place and his father’s power for good, and begin looking for the fox again.  There was no point in thinking about what he had lost until he could do something about it.  David pushed the thoughts away, and whispered, “So what do you want to do today Shane?”  David asked quietly, his arms sliding around Shane’s waist.

            Shane moved his head a bit, staring up at the kangaroo and grinning like an idiot.  Shane rubbed his paws together as he thought about what he really wanted to do to the kangaroo that was holding him so tenderly.  The raccoon had been waiting for a day like today for a long time. 

Today, he was finally going to mount the kangaroo and really make love to him.  It was something he had wanted to do almost since the day he had met David.  When the kangaroo had been brought to the academy by his parents, he’d been assigned to Shane’s bunkhouse.  Shane remembered what it felt like to come to the academy as the new gay kid.  You were scared and alone, and the new target of every homophobic instructor or boy trying to prove he wasn’t a queer any more.  So Shane had taken David under his wing and shone him the ropes.  They were friends, but Shane wanted it to be more then that.

Shane smiled as he lay in David’s arms, remembering all the things they had done together.  The raccoon had showed David all the tricks to having sex without getting caught; the subtle ways the tail raisers of Roosevelt avoided their keepers.  Shane remembered teaching David the signs they used to identify another gay cadet, the flicks of the ear in a code someone had made up years before and passed down to his bedmates.  Shane had shown David the right way to suck a guy off so he came quickly, and more importantly the right way to swallow so there was no evidence left behind. 

Over the past year together they had had sex in the gym showers, linen closets, and hidden places like this one. The kangaroo had fucked him in nearly every building on the campus. They’d done it all.  Except of course, for switch places.  David had always refused to be the bottom, and Shane knew why.  David had told him the very first time that the kangaroo wanted to save himself for his old lover, a fox he had left behind named Todd.  Shane could see the hurt and the pain the kangaroo felt whenever they would talk about Todd, but he also knew David really wanted to be mounted.  He was just too scared to go through with it.  Today, Shane was going to change that. 

Shane rubbed his bare chest against David’s, the raccoon’s smooth longer fur rubbing across the kangaroo short fur.  Shane’s voice was high pitched, with an innocent tone as he said, “Oh I don’t know, how long do we have?” The raccoon whispered with a grin, knowing full well they had plenty of time for what he wanted.  Shane pressed close to David, letting his knees rub gently against the kangaroo’s lap, until he could feel the kangaroo’s bulge growing against his thigh. 

“We’ve got another hour or two…” David trailed off as he stared at Shane’s face.  The band of black fur set off the raccoon’s deep brown eyes, which were filled with a mischievous glint.  Shane licked his lips slowly, his muzzle rubbing gently against David’s, and the kangaroo smiled nervously.  “What are you planning?”  David said quietly, smiling as the raccoon’s muzzle split into a mischievous grin.

“I’m going to make love to you David,” the raccoon whispered, his voice changing smoothly to a deep baritone as he pushed David back on to the blankets spread across the floor, laying on top of the kangaroo with a big smile. 

David grinned up at Shane a little, suddenly feeling very nervous as the raccoon’s weight pressed down on him.  Shane looked so serious all of a sudden; like this was different from all the other times they had played around before.  “What do you mean?”  David whispered as Shane kissed him again, “We make love all the time Shane…” David’s words faltered as Shane crouched between his legs and stretched out over him, the motion spreading David’s legs apart as the raccoon’s body covered his own in a very intimate and telling way.

“No David…” Shane whispered, his lips brushing against the kangaroo’s, his voice low and full of emotion as he pressed his body down on David’s.  David closed his eyes as the raccoon’s voice filled his ears and the raccoon’s lithe body pressed against all of David’s most private places.  The kangaroo let himself get in Shane’s voice. 

“We have sex all the time.”  Shane kissed the kangaroo’s nose, “We suck each other off in the showers,” Shane whispered as the raccoon’s crotch began to rub across David’s. “We play around under the covers at night,” was muttered into David’s neck as the kangaroo’s body was wrapped gently around the raccoon’s.

“But when we make love, when we come here and join our bodies together as lovers, only you make love to me…” Shane kissed David on the chin, and the kangaroo shivered as the raccoon’s crotch rubbed underneath his balls and Shane’s voice entranced him. 

“You take me…” the raccoon whispered as his paws clutch David’s chest fur, his voice dripping with passion, “you make love to me and make me yours as you mount me.”  David trembled as Shane kissed him gently on the throat.  The weight of the raccoon’s body shifted on top of David as Shane slowly dry humped against the kangaroo. “You claim me when you cum inside me.” Shane whispered, pressing down on David’s chest as the coon’s teeth gently nibbling on David’s neck and sent chills down the kangaroo’s spine to the bent tip of his tail. 

Shane’s lips brushed against David’s ears as he said, “This time, I’m going to take you.  I’m going to be your first David.” David felt his chest tighten up as Shane said the words.  “I love you David, and I want you to feel how much I love you.” 

David began to struggle a little when Shane shifted his hips and began to rub the crotch of his pants against the base of David’s thick tail, right at the break in the kangaroo’s pants that let his tail out. Right above where his tail hole was. “Shane, you know I don’t…” 

Shane quieted him with a kiss that lasted for a long while.  “I know you don’t,” the raccoon whispered.  “I know you’ve never been filled, never been taken.”  The raccoon’s voice was husky now, and David felt the words melting his resolve.  “I know you’ve turned away every guy that has wanted to mount you.  There have been a lot here, who have wanted you David,” Shane whispered, his paws beginning to undo David’s belt.  “But I know you want it.  You push everyone away, but you’re longing for a way to fill the hole you have in your heart.” Shane’s voice dropped low and rung with a painful truth as the raccoon continued to kiss and undress David.  The raccoon’s words made the kangaroo cringe, and the ache in his heart was unbearable as Shane whispered, “The hole Todd left behind when you came here.”

David tears escape his eyes and he sobbed softly as Shane’s beautiful voice said the fox’s name.  The raccoon’s voice was as silky and smooth as the raccoon’s tongue and paws.  The kangaroo opened his eyes and looked up at Shane.  The raccoon was just sitting there, lying on top of him and staring in his eyes with a loving look.  Shane’s dark brown eyes stayed steady as the dust danced in the space between their muzzles.  The raccoon’s paws ran across David’s chest and down his sides, the raccoon’s groin grinding slowly against the space between David’s balls and his tail.  David felt his pants grow tight as the slow movement, and he shivered despite the heat in the small, stuffy attic.

“I love you David. I know you love me.” The raccoon’s fingers began to unzip David’s pants. “I know you care about me enough to let me fill at least one hole for you…” 

            David let out a gasp as Shane’s paw grabbed him though his underwear.  The kangaroo tried to think of something to say as the raccoon began to pull off his pants, but he just couldn’t. He didn’t want to stop Shane.  The kangaroo felt like he was frozen as the delicate raccoon paws pulled his kaki pants and underwear off, exposing his body to the sun and the raccoon’s touch.  Then Shane stood up, unbuckled his belt and stepped out of his own pants.  David’s breath came in shallow gasps as Shane’s naked, slim body descended back down on top of him, their naked bodies and hard cocks rubbing together as their legs entwined and Shane slowly began to kiss him again. 

David looked into Shane’s eyes, those deep brown eyes surrounded by smooth black fur, and the kangaroo couldn’t resist.  He was too scared.  David couldn’t move as the gray and black raccoon slide across his tan fur and pressed him down into the blankets.  Shane positioned the much larger kangaroo just the way he wanted him, the raccoon’s hard cock rubbing unabashedly against David’s balls and shaft. David closed his eyes and buried his face in Shane’s neck, breathing in Shane’s scent as the raccoon knelt between his legs and lifted them up slightly, the kangaroo’s thick tail threaded between the raccoon’s knees as Shane pressed his shaft against the kangaroo’s tail hole for the first time. 

The weight of his friend on David’s chest made the kangaroo want to scream in fear.  Shane’s paws roamed across his body, touching, petting, caressing, and the raccoon’s body held David down like a lead weight.  David squirmed, trying to close his legs, but the raccoon’s body was holding them apart.  David could feel Shane’s knees rubbing the backs of his legs, and the hard length of the raccoon’s cock rubbed against his tail base as the tip brushed against his puckered tail hole.  David had never been so scared in his life.

David trusted Shane.  He confided in the raccoon and Shane knew everything there was to know about him.  Shane was the one David leaned on.  He was the reason David was surviving here at Roosevelt, and now he was slowly rubbing his cock between the kangaroo’s cheeks and tail.  He was going to mount him, and David wanted it but he just couldn’t let him. 

David pushed against Shane’s chest with his paws, forcing the raccoon back a few inches.  “No…” David whispered softly.  Shane kissed his roughly, a kiss full of passion and desire, and the raccoon’s body moved forward again.  David hooked his back paws against Shane’s thighs.  “NO!” he shouted and shoved Shane away as hard as he could, cringing as the sound echoed through the air ducts around them. 

Shane yelped as he was bowled over backwards, and the naked raccoon ended up sitting on his rump, his hard on sticking up out of the raccoon’s gray fur as he blinked in surprise at the kangaroo.  The kangaroo panted softly and David wiped his mouth on the back of his paw as he pulled his legs closed.  “Why not?”  Shane pleaded softly, his voice angry and sad as his eyes began to water. 

David pressed his ears down and covered his face.  “I can’t…  I’m sorry Shane I just can’t…” The kangaroo pulled his knees up under his chin and covered himself up.  “No one has ever taken me like that.” David whispered, unable to look Shane in the eyes.

“I know that.”  The raccoon whispered, his voice breaking into an angry whisper. “You think I don’t know that?  You’ve told me a hundred times that you want Todd to be the first one inside you.”  Tears began to run down the raccoon’s face, carving a path through the dust that had gathered in the raccoon’s furry cheeks.  “You talk about it every time someone comes onto you.  You say no because you love Todd and no one could love you like Todd does, but then you tell me how much you want it.”  The raccoon was panting now, his paws balled up into fists as eh tried to control his tears.  He had to remain strong. 

Shane’s voice was full of hurt and anger as he said, “You tell me how badly you want to say yes.  How you’re so worried that you won’t like being mounted, and won’t want Todd after it happens.  You want so badly to know what it feels like to have someone make love to you, and yet you always say no.”  The raccoon looked up at David with haunted eyes, his arms crossed over his bare chest. 

“Even though I never say no.”  The raccoon’s voice trembled as he tried to breath without crying,  “I let you take me.  I feel you inside my tail and I look into your eyes as you fill me up with everything you have and you make me so happy.  Please,” Shane’s voice pleaded, “Just let me do the same for you.  Let me try and fill the hole in your own heart.” 

David closed his eyes and looked away, the raccoon’s voice almost breaking into sobs.  “I’ve tried to do that for you.”  Shane whispered, “I’ve tried so hard to make you happy.  I’ve done everything I can and still you shut me out. ”  The raccoon’s paws settled on David’s chest, and the kangaroo looked up into Shane’s eyes. “Don’t shut me out anymore David…” the coon’s fingers dug into his chest fur, “Please… let me make you happy.”  The raccoon collapsed forward onto the kangaroo, his face pressed into David’s strong chest as he forced himself not to cry.  “Just this once.”  Shane whispered, and David felt his heart break. 

David closed his eyes and leaned forward, embracing the raccoon tenderly.  He pressed his face pressing against Shane’s, their muzzles rubbing together slowly.  David brushed his lips across the raccoon’s round ear as he whispered, “Okay.” 

The raccoon opened his eyes and stared into David’s.  David slowly opened his legs again and wrapped them around Shane’s waist.  Shane’s body settled back on top of him, their bodies nervously meshing together as they kissed gently, breaking through all the fear they felt. 

David trembled as he felt Shane’s paws press down on his chest, the shorter raccoon massaging him gently as Shane kissed him gently on the lips.  David felt Shane lift his legs slowly and the raccoon’s hard cock began to rub between his cheeks again. Shane didn’t say anything.  He just stared into David eyes.  Shane’s cock got harder and harder as it rubbed against the kangaroo’s tail hole, and the kangaroo felt his anxiety begin to climb again as the tip of the raccoon’s cock began to press against his ring.  David opened his mouth to tell Shane to stop, but David was a second too late and he gasped in the pain of his first time as the raccoon slipped inside him.

David’s legs trembled as he looked up in Shane’s face.  The raccoon’s muzzle was a mask of pleasure as the tip of his cock pushed past the ring of David’s tail hole.  The kangaroo gasped in pain, closing his eyes tightly as Shane hilted himself deep inside David and stretched the kangaroo open wide.  David shuddered and let out a low moan of pain as Shane’s cock pierced him and filled him up.  David began panting, relaxing as the warm comfort of the raccoon’s arms engulfed his head as Shane slipped his arms around his head.  David’s voice abandoned him as pain and pleasure took over his mind and he lay underneath Shane, taken for the first time by another boy and trembling in pleasure. 

David trembled as Shane whispered to him softly, the black furred arms around David’s head, blocking out the bright light and strong scents from the room. 

The kangaroo lay on his back, shaking as his tail hole was stretched open by someone’s cock for the first time.  David closed his eyes and whimpered into Shane’s chest, his body trembling.  It felt like his tail was on fire with pain and a strange pleasure.  His tail hole ached, but the raccoon’s voice filled his ears and David breathed in Shane’s tangy scent.  The raccoon’s beautiful voice lulled his mind into a quite, easy peace.  The raccoon began to move slowly, and David felt those slow thrusts wash away all the pain in his tail and heart in an ocean of pleasure.

David could only muster a quiet whimper as Shane mated with him.  The raccoon brought his hips up and down, laying on top of David’s chest and kissing David gently as he pushed his cock deep into the kangaroo.  The raccoon’s body began to rock back and forth on top of David as Shane moved his hips slowly back and forth, his lithe body moving across the kangaroo’s muscled frame.  David trembled and tilted his head back, letting out a strangle moan as Shane’s dick pushed deep inside him, filling David with a deep pleasure that made the kangaroo’s cry tears of joy.

David closed his eyes, his legs stretching out and encircling the raccoon’s waist, making Shane groan as loudly in pleasure as David did to Shane’s thrusts.  It felt so good to have Shane thrusting inside him David couldn’t think.  Shane’s cock pushed into the kangaroo over and over again, and David couldn’t form a thought long enough to say anything.  All he could do was lay underneath Shane and take the raccoon’s thrusts into his body.  The kangaroo loved every moment of it.  It felt like his tail was being turned inside out in the most pleasurable way imaginable.  It hurt, but it felt so good the pain just gave it an edge that made it all better. 

David rode that feeling for a long time, his eyes closed as Shane lavished him with kisses and caressed his body.  He could feel the raccoon shifting his body, as Shane hooked his arms under the kangaroo’s knee so he could hold David’s legs up in the air.  The move left the coon’s dexterous paws free to roam across his chest and stomach. Shane’s tongue danced across David’s muzzle, and he could feel the raccoon’s body bumping into his own as Shane made slow love to him.   

Then the raccoon slipped a paw around David’s cock and gave the kangaroo’s rock hard a good squeeze.  David tried to stifle his gasp, but it was pretty loud.  His back arched as he pushed up against the raccoon’s paw, whimpering in pleasure.  Shane slid his legs up under him in that moment, and the kangaroo’s butt came down onto the raccoon’s lap. 

David whimpered again, his body twisting in please as his own weight impaled his butt on Shane’s cock.  The kangaroo let out a pitiful moan of pleasure, and Shane just smiled down at him and caressed the kangaroo’s muzzle. 

David panted as he looked up into the raccoon’s face, which broke into a wide grin as the raccoon began to bounce him on his lap, lifting David’s lower half up with the force of his trusts.  David lay back on the blankets and groaned, the kangaroo’s paws twisting in the sheets as two sweaty bodies slapped together.  David stared up at Shane’s face, shaking as Shane held his butt in the air and fucked him closer and closer to climax. 

Shane panted, trying to keep control of his body as he held David’s ass in his lap and bucked his hips, taking the kangaroo deeply.  David’s legs were up over his shoulders now, and the tan fur of David’s muscular legs framed his view of the world, revealing only David’s muscular body withering and shaking as he fucked the kangaroo.  The look on David’s face as they fucked was amazing. He was in heaven; his face twisted into a smile as he moaned loudly.  The best part was David’s cock. 

The kangaroo was leaking all over, and Shane ran his fingers running across the kangaroo’s now sticky shaft.  David’s cock looked so big from this angle, almost close enough for Shane to lick.  Shane’s paw worked up and down the thick shaft, and the raccoon leaned forward slowly, keeping his thrusts steady as he bent double and kissed the head of the kangaroo’s cock.  Shane gave a soft moan as the kangaroo’s hips jerked up and David’s cock slipped into his muzzle.

David let out a loud gasp as Shane wrapped his lips around the tip of his cock.    The raccoon’s paws and mouth began to work furiously on the kangaroo’s cock.  Shane could only barely thrust his hips in this position, but he was buried deep inside the kangaroo and was moving the last inch or two in and out of David quickly.  David’s legs began to spasm as Shane’s tongue swirled around the head of his dick.  Instinct seemed to take over David, and the kangaroo planted his long legs on either side of the raccoon’s slim body.  He thrust his hips move up, sliding his dick into Shane’s muzzle before letting his hips fall again, a moan escaping him as gravity spread David’s tail hole around the raccoon’s dick.

 David closed his eyes and panted hard, his back on the floor, his arms and legs straining as he helped the raccoon fuck and suck him off at the same time.  David felt like his whole body was reduced to the inches of flesh inside Shane’s muzzle and the raccoon’s cock inside his butt and it washed away everything else in his life.  All the pain, all the heartache was gone. All he felt was happiness.

  Shane grinned and moved his hips as David got into the mating.  It was such a huge turn on, knowing that he was the reason the kangaroo was moaning, and his cock was the reason David’s body shook underneath him.  Shane grinned as David’s balls pulled up close to his body, and pre began to pour from his cock into the raccoon’s muzzle. 

Shane smiled as he swirled his tongue around the kangaroo’s cock head, tracing the crown slowly as he thrust up into David.  He held the kangaroo tight as David’s body tightened up, his back arched and his kangaroo lover came with a howl befitting a wolf, his body shaking in pleasure because someone loved him enough to mount him. 

David cried out loudly as Shane continued to pound his cock up into the kangaroo’s spasming butt, but the taste of the kangaroo’s cum and the sudden tightness around his cock pushed Shane over the edge too, and the raccoon thrust as deep as he could into the kangaroo.  The raccoon’s hips bucked, and he gasped, his body tensing as he flooded the kangaroo with his seed.  The raccoon closed his eyes as he came, and David held him tight as the raccoon came inside him for the first time.  David closed his eyes and lost touch with everything except the moment Shane became his lover and came deep inside him.  He was whole.

David realized he panting when he could feel again. He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, the wood covered with names of lovers surrounded by paw carved hearts. He could feel Shane lying across his lower half, pinning his long tail to the floor and still half holding his legs in the air. His body felt dull and full, and David shivered when he realized Shane’s softening cock was still inside his butt.

The kangaroo could feel the sweat and dust clinging to his short fur, and the sticky cum smeared across his chest from the coon’s muzzle.  He could even feel it leaking slowly from around the raccoon’s shaft in his butt.  David lifted his head wearily, staring down at the raccoon.  Shane lifted his head from his tan stomach, gasping and grinning like a fool, his face covered in sticky white cum.  The raccoon leaned forward, his cock slipping out as they kissed slowly.  The raccoon’s paw slowly caressed David’s face and the kangaroo’s body gave a shudder of pleasure as he kissed the raccoon and sighed deeply in contentment. 

“You liked it, didn’t you?”  Shane whispered, and David could only nod yes. 

“I love you David…” Shane whispered, the dust they had stirred up floating in the beams of sunlight filtering thru the roof.  David stared into Shane’s brown eyes again, and whispered.  “I…” David paused, his words catching in his throat.  He’d never told the raccoon he loved him.  “I love you too.” David whispered finally, his heart breaking as he admitted it to himself. 

The boys lay together for a long moment covered in their own seed, both filled with joy and sorrow as they held each other tightly, emotions warring for their respective hearts.  They both looked away and hugged each other tight, their naked bodies entwined together as their eyes watered.

“You still love Todd, don’t you?” the raccoon asked softly, and David nodded slowly.

Shane smiled weakly as his paws slowly wiped cum out of David’s fur.  The kangaroo looked so incredibly sad, as if his world had just been shattered apart and he didn’t know what to do.  Shane felt his heart ache for David, and tears began to run down his cheeks as he spoke. “I’m never going to replace him… am I?”  The raccoon whispered softly. 

David blinked, and shook his head, tears running down the kangaroo’s face, joining with Shane’s as their muzzles rubbed together.  “No…” David whispered, a desperate broken whisper of pure despair.  Shane smiled just a little, because at least kangaroo had wanted this to work.   “But I do love you Shane.” 

“But you still love Todd more, don’t you.”  The raccoon said quietly.  It was not really a question.  David closed his eyes and looked away, tears running from the boy’s eyes.  Shane nodded once, as if deciding something and he hugged the kangaroo tightly around the neck.  “It doesn’t matter.” Shane said evenly, “I always knew you would choose him over me if it came to that.  I just…”

David felt the tears running down his face, joining with Shane’s as the raccoon gently kissed him.  “I just wanted to give you something special.  Something that was mine and yours alone.” 

David caressed the raccoon’s face softly, wiping away the raccoon’s tears.  “You have,” David whispered as he pulled the raccoon into a tight hug.  “You gave me this.” David’s voice said everything Shane needed to hear.  This one afternoon, this one real mating had meant more to the kangaroo then anything else they had ever done before. 

This was something real, and it was theirs alone. 

The two boys lay together for a long time, holding each other tightly before gathering their clothes up and getting ready to leave.  They rubbed air fresheners across their fur, but they would have to shower to get the scent of each other off before bed.  They both lingered longer then they should have, both boy wanting to spend as much time together as possible.   With the crazy scheduling that the instructors put them though, they might not see each other again for a few days.

Shane could tell from the way David looked at him it didn’t matter how long it took, he was going to see the kangaroo again and David would be all right when he did.  This would keep the kangaroo happy for a long time to come, and that made it all worthwhile to the raccoon.

David and Shane crawled into the small space that lead away from the tiny attic they called Sanctuary.  They moved through the ceiling for a while, until they came to a break in the crawl space where they would have to separate so that they did not appear in the hallways together.  The raccoon turned back and smiled at David.  The kangaroo looked so hot, dressed up so handsomely in his school uniform.  Shane stared up at David and smiled.  The two boys gave each other a small, nervous kiss.  “I’ll see you soon.”  David whispered, and they embraced each other tightly. 

“I love you, David.” Shane’s soft, beautiful voice whispered.

David smiled and whispered, “I love you too.” as the raccoon turned to go.

A crash and light filled the tiny crawl space Shane was in, as suddenly the floor Shane was standing on was splintered into kindling under the blow of a sledgehammer.  David gaped in shock as the raccoon screamed, and the crawlspace under the raccoon collapsed into the room below.   Shane grabbed hold of the side, trying to scramble back up into the crawlspace with David. 

“GOTCHA!”  Sergeant Rock’s voice bellowed from the room below, and a thick, leathery arm reached thru the newly made hole and grabbed hold of Shane’s leg.

Shane yelped in pain and terror as the rhino yanked him bodily towards the hole.

 David grabbed the raccoon’s outstretched arms, and he was almost pulled violently into the room below with the raccoon.  Shane cried out in pain as his legs disappear into the hole, breaking it open wider as he was dragged down.  David could see the sharp edges of the wood jabbing into the raccoon’s stomach, and the raccoon’s face was twisted in pain. 

David braced his feet on either side of the hole and held onto the coon’s arms.  The kangaroo put every once of strength he had into pulling the raccoon back up, and Shane tried to help, but he couldn’t pull Shane back to safety.  David’s eyes meet Shane’s as the raccoon’s paws struggled to hold onto David, hugging him tightly around the shoulders as they struggled against Sergeant Rock’s grip on the raccoon. 

David held on to the raccoon as tightly as he could.  For a moment, the kangaroo held Shane in place, his powerful legs straining against the wall and resisting the pull of the rhino below.  Shane struggled, but he couldn’t kick himself free, and he could feel more people grabbing hold of his legs below. 

“Run!”  Shane whispered fiercely.  David stared into Shane’s eyes and shook his head. 

“No…” the kangaroo whispered, readjusting his grip to get a better hold on the coon.

“You have too.”  Shane whispered. “I can’t lose you.”  David stared into the raccoon’s eyes. Shane’s voice was filled with enough sadness it seemed to stop time for just one moment.  Shane kissed David one last time and let go of the kangaroo.

David cried out as the raccoon was yanked from his arms, and he scrambled backwards, deeper into the crawl space.  He watched in horror as the instructors with Sergeant Rock threw Shane to the floor in the room below.  Light flooded the passage from the hole and David could see a crowd of instructors in uniforms holding Shane bodily to the floor.  The raccoon struggled against them, but Sergeant Rock kicked Shane violently in the gut and the raccoon went down hard under the rhino’s blow.

David turned away from the hole as one of the instructor’s looked back up at the hole in the ceiling.  Paws reached up into the crawl space and they began searching for him in all directions. 

The kangaroo moved quickly through the crawlspace and back into the Sanctuary.  He looked around in a panic at all the books and blankets and tiny cherished things that other boys had scattered across the room.  He couldn’t let the instructor’s find this place.  This place, these things belonged to people.  They meant something to them. This place was his and Shane’s and they could not have it. 

David threw everything he could find onto the big blanket he and Shane had made love on not an hour before.  The notebooks, the pictures, the diaries, everything that meant something to someone, he took and bundled up in the blanket.  Then David kicked open the window and ran across the rooftops, dancing across the sloping roofs of the Academy in the darkness.  He stashed everything in a safe place in one of the other buildings, in the hopes that he would be able to return it all one day soon. 

***

Shane regained consciousness with a splitting headache and an painful ache in his ribcage.  He blinked unsteadily and looked around.  His body was bathed in bright light from an overhead lamp, that hung just inches above his head.  The bare light bulb was so close the heat made the raccoon swivel his ears back and press them against his head.  The lamp illuminated only a small circle around him and blinded him to the dark room beyond.  The lingering scent of sweat and copper hung in the air.  

Shane took stock of his situation and found he was sitting backwards in a sturdy wooden chair so that back of the chair had been propping up his head when he was unconscious.  Now, it kept him sitting upright.  He shifted his paws and realized they were tied together and to the slats of the chair back.  He was forced to hug the back of the chair, and even his hind paws were tied to the chair legs, so he was forced to sit spread eagle on the uncomfortable chair, his tail and butt hanging over the edge.  The coon shivered as the cold in the room seeped into his fur, and he pressed forward against the wooden chair back and curled his long tail underneath him to hide his body as best he could. 

After all, he was extremely naked.

Footsteps echoed in the room, along with the dull slap of leather on someone’s palm.  Shane turned his head to see who it was, and he could just make out the form of Sergeant Rock coming towards him in the darkness.  The rhino stopped just outside the light, so that he was only illuminated from the neck down.  Shane recognized him by scent alone, but he had never seen the rhino like this though.

The rhino’s upper body glistened in the light, like he had waxed his skin somehow.  The rhino’s bare, muscled chest glistened in the light as he flexed, and his hands were twisting a thick brown bullwhip.  The whip seemed to absorb the light instead of reflect it like the rest of the rhino’s clothing did.  He wasn’t wearing his normal army pants, but a pair of dark black leather chaps with no crotch that clung to his legs and glistened in the light.  Shane felt his stomach turn as fear took hold of him.  Only a tented, black leather jock strap separated him from the rhino’s bulging cock. 

 Shane’s ears pressed against his head, and his heart began to race as he stared at the whip and the rhino’s barely restrained hard on.  The rhino’s face came into view for just a second as the sergeant took a long drag on his cigar, the fiery red glow illuminating his wicked grin.

Shane began to struggle, twisting in his bonds in fear, but the ropes held firm and chaffed at his fur.  He stared to say something but the rhino didn’t even bother to listen.  He didn’t ask any questions. 

He let the whip do the talking.

***

Back in The Present day…

            ***

“I never got to see you again after they took you away.”  David whispered into the phone.  “They must have questioned you for days, but you never told them it was me.”

Shane gave a soft laugh on the other end of the phone.  The raccoon had never told the kangaroo what had happened after their afternoon together.  There had been no chance to.  Shane ran his finger through the fur on his chest, and he shivered slightly as his back burned at just the memory of the beating and the torture that followed.  “No David I didn’t, but Rock sure wanted your name.  I at least kept you safe even if they found the Sanctuary.” 

David stared at the phone in confusion. “They didn’t find Sanctuary.”

Shane’s voice was broken by tears as he whispered, “It’s… it’s still there?” 

“Yes,” David said evenly, trying to control his emotions.  “I couldn’t save you, but you saved Sanctuary.  You gave me the chance to hide everything. Then when you didn’t break, they had no way to find it.”   David smiled, filled with so much pride at his friend’s sacrifice.  “Because of you, they had no one else to punish.  You saved a lot of cadets from a lot of misery.”  David paused for a moment, before adding, “You didn’t have to do that you know.  We all knew the risks of going to Sanctuary, but you put yourself on the line for us and you kept Sanctuary alive.”  The line was silent for a few minutes, and the rain falling out filled the space in between words.  David listened as Shane cried quietly on the other end of the phone, and he wished he could hug the raccoon. 

The kangaroo sniffled softly, shifting on his tiny bed as the rain began to die down along with Shane’s tears.   “When I put everything back in Sanctuary I carved our names together into the ceiling. I made them bigger then anyone else’s.  I made sure everyone knew about what you had done for them.”

David wiped the tears away from his eyes.  “Sanctuary still exists in that horrible place.  It’s still special because you never gave up.  No one can take what we had there away from us.”  The kangaroo sobbed softly. “Not ever”   

“Thank you.”  David said quietly.

Shane was silent for a moment, and then when he spoke, his voice was soft and filled with a pained happiness, as if he were crying in pain and joy at the same time.  “They said they had found it.  They were so horrible about it, taunting me that they knew everything about my secret hiding place.  But I couldn’t let them win, so I kept quiet.”  The raccoon sobbed, clutching a pillow to his chest.  For just once in his life, it felt like he had done something worthwhile, something that had meaning.

“Not for that.” David whispered, “You know what I meant.  Thank you for being my first.”

David listened to the rain for a moment as he quietly shushed the raccoon, comforting Shane as the raccoon cried openly now.  “I just…” the raccoon whispered, “I just wish I could have talked to you one more time before they made me leave.  I just couldn’t, one word to you and Rock would have known it was you I had been with.  He would have hurt you too.  All I could do was look at you.  I wanted to tell you so much and I couldn’t even say your name.”  The raccoon was crying again, his voice choked with tears. “I just wanted it to be something special…” 

“It was Shane.”  David whispered softly, tears running down his own cheeks. “It might not have been what you wanted it to be, but that afternoon means the world to me.  It kept me alive after you were gone.  It helps me get out.  You saved me.”  David swallowed softly, silence filling the air. 

Shane smiled softly to himself as he cried with the kangaroo, separated by miles and yet connected by a thin wire and their shared memories.  Shane’s heart warmed, and for once in a long time the raccoon felt really loved.  “I guess that will have to be enough won’t it.”  The raccoon swallowed nervously, afraid to ask his next question.  Ever since seeing the kangaroo again, the thought of mating with David again had lingered in the back of his mind.  “Is there maybe, any chance we could…”

“Don’t ask me that Shane.  Not yet. ” David whispered fiercely, his heart breaking as he refused the raccoon’s advances before Shane even finished asking the question.  “I don’t even know where Todd is, let alone if he still loves me.  I… I can’t be with anyone else right now.”

“He loves you David.”  The raccoon’s voice was hollow, with a fierce certainty to the words, “and you know that.”

“Does he?  It’s been two years since I saw him Shane.  He might be in love with someone else now.”  The kangaroo’s voice reflected the fear he felt.  “I fell for you.  What if he did the same?  What if he doesn’t understand everything that happened at Roosevelt?  He wasn’t there; he can’t know how bad it was.  He might not understand the things we did there just to stay sane in that place.”  The kangaroo’s voice trailed off, and he couldn’t bring himself to speak.

The voice on the other end of the phone chased David’s fear away with calm, soothing words that seemed so unique to Shane’s voice.  “You know it’s going to be okay David.  We did those things to stay sane in that place.  You’re just scared.” After a momentary pause, Shane whispered, “Don’t be,” and then the sound of rain and the hum of the phone line filled the air.  “Todd still loves you.” Shane said softly.

“Thank you,” David said softly.

“Do you still love me?” Shane whispered after several long moments.

“Yes.”  David answered,  “but you know that nothing has changed.”

Shane was about to respond when the door to his room flew and Alan rushed inside, gasping for air.  Shane sat up as the room was suddenly filled with light from the hall and then made dark again as Alan closed the door.  Shane dried his eyes quickly so his new friend would not see he had been crying.  He stared at Alan, who was pressed against the door and gasping for air, the scent of fear rolling of the rodent like a wave.

“What happened?”  The raccoon asked, shocked at how scared the rat was.

“Huh?  Nothing happened… I said…” David’s said over the phone, but Shane interrupted him, “No, not you. I heard you, but Alan just came in.  Hold on.” 

David fell silent, letting Shane deal with Alan for a moment.  The kangaroo closed his eyes and sighed, clutching his pillow against his chest.  David rolled over on his side and held the pillow tight, pressing it against his throat and wishing more then ever he was Todd in his arms tonight.  The sound of the rain falling outside made the kangaroo’s heart ache for his lost love, as lightning filled the night’s sky and made the room bright as day.

***

That same bolt of lightning crashed outside Todd’s house and caused the fox to stir in his sleep.  Todd did not immediately wake from his dreams however.  Instead the slim fox lay across his bed still fully dressed, sleeping fitfully as he dreamed, his legs twitching and trembling as if he were trying to run. 

In his dream, he was running but getting nowhere.  Todd was surrounded by an inky darkness that seemed to swirl with muted colors he couldn't quite identify. It was if his eyes were closed, and all he could see was his own body.  The world seemed to shift and bend as Todd raced through the darkness, searching for someone, anything else. 

The only constant besides the blackness was the sound of falling rain.  It surrounded him, deafening all sound. Todd looked around in fearful confusion, and his bright red fur seemed to shine in the milky blackness.  It felt dreadfully cold without his clothes.

Suddenly, the fox’s fur bushed out as a peel thunder crashed around him and Todd jumped again as a pair of warm, strong arms grabbed him from behind.  The tawny brown fur seemed dull against the brightness of Todd’s white chest, and the fox struggled until David whispered, “Don’t worry, I have you,” in his ear and hugged the fox softly.

Todd sighed and relaxed as the familiar, comforting touch of David’s muzzle against the back of his neck calmed him down.  The kangaroo held him gently from behind, and Todd felt completely safe in those strong arms.  The fox turned around and slipped his arms around the kangaroo neck, sinking into David’s embrace as the kangaroo murmured, “I love you.”

Todd smiled up at David and tried to say ‘I love you’ back, but the fox’s lips still didn’t seem to work.  David’s did.  The kangaroo kissed Todd slowly and David’s paws caressed the fox tenderly.  The boys press close to each other, paws touching each other intimately as they kissed passionately.  The fox broke the kiss with a slight gasp, the sound inaudible in the rainy blackness as David’s paw slipped underneath the fox’s bushy red tail. Todd lifted his tail up high and he shuddered all over when David’s finger slipped inside the fox’s tail.  Todd pressed himself against his lover, rubbing their growing erections together and kissing David passionately as the kangaroo’s finger sunk inside him, getting him ready. 

The fox gasped in pain as David suddenly and violently shoved him away.  The kangaroo’s face was twisted in disgust, and Todd gaped in shock as the kangaroo sneered at him.  “Cum?”  The kangaroo held up his paw accusingly so Todd could see the white seed clinging to the tips, “You couldn’t even keep your tail down for one minute, could you?”  David sneered, his voice so angry it made Todd cringe in fear.  “The first wolf who comes along, and you lift your tail for him just like that? “ 

The kangaroo’s eyes narrowed, and his voice was cold and hard as he said, “You don’t even care about me at all.”  The kangaroo flicking the white cum from his fingertips and sneered at the fox as Todd began to cry.  Todd felt his throat close up, and he tried to explain what had happened, that it wasn’t like that at all, that he still loved David but his voice just didn’t work.  The kangaroo turned away from Todd and ran.

Todd cried out and tried to chase after his lover, but the rain drowned out the sound again.  He panted as he raced after David, desperate to catch up to the kangaroo as David ran farther and farther away from him.  Todd just couldn’t seem to keep up.  His legs just didn’t work.  It was as if he were running through water.  Todd reached out, but the fox’s paws found only a black wall that stopped him from following his lover. Todd’s voice remained silent as he tried to call out to David.  Todd wailed in silence, as David’s faded from view into the darkness, gone forever from his life.

Todd woke with a snort and a yelp as more thunder rattled the glass in his windows.  The fox groaned as the side of his muzzle tingled and his legs ached painfully.  His face was pressed hard against something cold and flat, and the side of his muzzle felt numb.  Todd realized he had been struggling against his own bed sheets while trying to run.  He had been lost in his nightmares, and it had been a truly horrible dream. 

The fox sat up slowly, his head swimming and his muzzle tingling.  The small fox shivered from the chill that had settled into his fur.  Todd wrapped his long fluffy tail around himself, hugging it gently to his chest as he rubbed the side of his muzzle. 

Todd rubbed the tears and sleep from his eyes as the sound of the rain outside continued to fill his ears.  The sound sent a chill running down his spine and made his slightly damp fur stand on end.  His heart raced and his mind was gripped with fear as the effects of the nightmare clutched at the fox’s heart.  The words David had said in the dream echoed I his mind, and Todd’s black paws trembled as picked up the picture frame he had fallen asleep on.  He sobbed quietly, staring at the happy snapshot of David’s smiling face.  The kangaroo’s happy face stared up at Todd, his bright blue eyes and wide shining, frozen forever in a happy smile. 

David’s face had not been happy in his dream.  Todd felt his throat close up again as he remembered the look of disgust on the kangaroo’s face as he turned his back on the fox and ran.  He had been so angry.  It was just a stupid dream, but it made the fox feel so small and alone. 

Lightning flashed again, and the wind howled as the rain poured outside.  Todd hated the rain.  It only reminded him that he was alone and of the night that David had been taken from him. Why did he have to be so alone?  Todd flattened his ears and curled his tail around his legs as he stared at the picture, pulling his jacket closed for warmth.    The fox flicked his ears back and stared down at the blue leather and green fabric trim of the jacket.  Todd sniffed the collar, and Keith’s scent filled his nose.

Todd choked on his tears again; a low whine escaping his muzzle as the wolf’s scent reminded him of everything that Keith had done to his body that night.  Todd’s chest heaved as he fought back tears, his ears flicking back as he remembered the wolf’s gentle touch and their slow lovemaking.  Just the thought of Keith’s body pressing down on him made Todd blush, his ears swiveling backwards as his face grew hot at the memory of such a pleasurable moment. 

It had felt so incredibly wonderful to be touched like that again.  Todd sobbed as tears began to run down Todd’s face, and he trembled in the jacket that was much too big for his thin frame.  It felt like Keith was still with him somehow.  The wolf’s rich scent filled the air and it felt like the wolf was hugging him gently from behind, just like David had done in his dream. 

Todd’s finger brushed across David’s picture, his fingers tracing the kangaroo’s features slowly as the fox stared at the face of his lover.  Todd’s heart, warmed by the memory of Keith’s lovemaking grew tight again.  Todd trembled slowly as he realized just how true his dream was.  He had rejected David and chosen Keith instead. 

‘What have I done?’ the fox thought desperately as he stared at David’s happy, smiling face. ‘Why did I let Keith take me like that?  Why… why did I do this!’  Todd’s heart began to break as his mind raced.  He had betrayed David, and for what?  Just for a few moments in the arms of another man?  Keith had said him he loved him.  Todd had just wanted someone to hold him, to not to be alone any more.

Todd’s ears drooped and his tail hung limply off the bed as a tiny, horrible thought filtered into the fox’s brain.  David would never, ever love him again.  Even if he did come back, how could the kangaroo ever forgive him for this betrayal?  How could never belong to David with Keith’s seed inside him? The last hope Todd had of ever being with David died in Todd’s heart as the rain outside turned into a downpour again.

Now he was going to be alone forever. 

“What have I done?” Todd moaned softly.  He ripped Keith’s football jacket off his shoulders and flung it away from him, trying to make the wolf’s scent leave his nose, but the wolf’s scent clung to his fur and Todd could feel the wetness under his tail that marked him as the wolf’s lover. 

The fox wept like never before, his heart aching like a hole in his chest.  It was just like the night David had been taken away in every way, from the lonely feeling in Todd’s heart to the thunderstorm outside his window.  Only this time it was his fault. 

Todd clutched David’s picture in his paws so hard the glass cracked under his fingers.  The little fox gasped in pain and whined, letting the shattered picture frame drop to the bed as he clutched one paw.  He lifted up his paw and stared at the end of his index finger, where the sharp shard of glass had sliced his fingertip open.  Todd stared as blood welled up in a big drop and then fell onto David’s picture, obscuring the kangaroo’s face in a blotch of red.

Todd knew in his heart he would never be with David again. 

The glass did not hurt so much on the second or third cut. 

***

Rebecca Hayes hummed happily to herself as she kissed her husband on the cheek.  The morning sun streamed into the windows as it peeked through the last few clouds that remained from the storm. She picked up the laundry basket in their bathroom.   “Will you start breakfast dear?”  She asked as Michael Hayes buttoned his shirt. “I’m going to start a load of laundry and wake Todd up.” 

Mr. Hayes smiled and patted his wife on the shoulder, “Certainly honey, but you should let him sleep a while longer.  He didn’t get home till late.” 

Mrs. Hayes chuckled as her husband hugged her from behind, taking advantage of her full arms to steal a quick kiss. “I know, but I don’t want him staying out late like that.” She said with a grin, “I figure waking him up extra early every time he does should fix that problem.” 

Mr. Hayes laughed at his wife.  She always gets her way, he thought, and kissed her cheek.  “Sounds like a plan. Will waffles be good?”

Mrs. Hayes nodded, “Perfect dear,” and they kissed again briefly.

 Rebecca Hayes hummed happily as she walked down the hall, carrying the basket of clothes in one arm, and knocked on Todd’s door.  “Todd honey?”  She said loudly, “It’s time to get up.” 

No one answered as Mr. Hayes passed by and went down stairs to the kitchen, so Mrs. Hayes opened the door a crack.  She could see Todd lying face down on the bed, his head turned away from the door and his covers pushed off the bed.  “Todd honey?”  She said again, but Todd didn’t stir.  The phone downstairs began to ring, and she frowned a little.  Who could be calling this early? “Would you get that honey?”  She called over her shoulder. 

Mrs. Hayes opened her son’s door, and looked down as the door pushed something across the floor.   A deep blue jacket was stuck partway under the door, and it had the words ‘Hadenview High Football’ embroidered across the shoulder.  She bent down and picked up the jacket, which had Keith’s name across the back and his scent clung to the leather and fabric. 

The vixen furrowed her brow in confusion, “Did Keith come in last night Todd?”  Mrs. Hayes twitched her nose as she caught her son’s scent from across the room because it smelled very different then what she was used too.  Instead of the soft earthy smell she had come to associate with her son, it smelled like copper in Todd’s room.  She turned on the light and walked to her son’s side. 

 The pit of her stomach lurched as if she had been walking down the stairs and tried to take one step too many when she got a good look at her son.

 Todd’s white chest fur was a deep red, covered in blood from the cuts on his arms.  She could see the shards of jagged glass clutched in her son’s paw as he lay face down on top of David’s broken picture.

Mr. Hayes was just about to pick up the ringing phone when he heard his wife scream.

***

Go To Chapter 18: The Morning After